October 7, 2008
· Filed under Faith, I'm avoiding study..., Not happy Jan (it deserves its own category), Over-analysis, Random, Uni stuff
It is now day 4 in a row of unproductive days. Not completely unproductive…but I don’t feel as though I have enough to show for what I’ve been doing. I have to present my findings in 3 days. THREE DAYS. Oh it’s painful. Painfully painful! All I want to do is dance (oh…that reminds me I’ll have to post on my nomination for the ‘logies’ of dancing soon- what a joke)…but yes because of course that’s going to lead to the career of my dreams! It’s typical though…at this time it’s usual for the most abstract of things to start taking over my brain and convincing me that they’re the most important things I should be thinking of right at this minute…as compared to writing a thesis.
I lay awake in bed last night for 3 whole hours- THREE long, agonising hours- before I got to sleep and in the end only managed about 4 hours shuteye, and the night before that I slept for 13 hours straight without waking once- much to my disgust. This is unusual!! Not only are sleeping patterns up the creek…but I no longer like food. Vegemite toast and extra salted peanuts can at times be forced down, but otherwise it doesn’t take much more than a spoonful of breakfast cereal to remind me that the digestive system has a wonderful feature called regurgitation. Lovely.
I feel like I’m being tempted in the desert. No I’m not likening myself to Jesus…I just empathise with him right now. He had a big job to do and all these enticing things were there for the picking, but he abstained. Well I wish I could say I was as noble, holy and able to ignore the lure of the grass on the other side. My defenses are weak at the moment- I can tell. The idea of things that usually seem absurd are all of a sudden ‘not so bad- surely?’. *sigh*
Oh great! Chainsaws have started singing their sweet tune next door. Perfect study noise.
September 29, 2008
· Filed under I'm avoiding study..., People I love, Random
As I said last time, blogging’s slipped its way down the priority ladder recently as other things like a 12,000 word thesis have taken precedence. However I felt compelled to quickly jot down some thoughts from the last week.
I had my 3rd visit to the Naturopath last week and it was a rather eventful hour or so. To cut a long story short…I’m hoping it’s my last visit. In the process of having my finger pricked to find out what blood type I am I somehow fainted. Seems ridiculous for such a thing to happen when I wasn’t even looking at my finger as it was stabbed or anything like that- but a few minutes later I was off in lala land dreaming about playing with my nephew Sam when all of a sudden I was being shaken and my head was shoved downwards as the woman was saying ‘keep breathing!!’. It was an odd experience- I could’ve sworn I was out for hours and I didn’t quite know where or who I was when I came to either. I was already feeling under the weather that morning and since then I’ve come down with some horrible head cold that doesn’t want to go away. It’s been 6 days of basically no uni work because of it and I’m beginning to wonder if I should apply for an extension (cringes…I hate applying for extensions!).
Other than that going on, (and I mention this quietly/tentatively) there does seem to be a budding friendship starting for one of my family members which is exciting and weird at the same time. It’s kind of forced me to re-evaluate my relationship with this family member, which frightened me at first but I must admit that it’s been good as it’s forced us to delve into some tricky topics together and remind me of how much I cherish our closeness.
That’s all I have time for now, another time when I’m sick of thesis-ing I’ll jot some more thoughts down 
September 22, 2008
· Filed under I'm avoiding study..., Not happy Jan (it deserves its own category), Uni stuff
I haven’t been able to blog for a while now and it will be a longer while yet before I’ll be back in the land of normal unfortunately. My thesis is due in just over 4 weeks and the pressure is increasing daily (much to the disappointment of the little person inside of me that keeps saying- ‘it’s Springtime! Let’s go out and play!’).
I went away for the weekend to a little country town out past Ballarat which was nice. I took my laptop and actually got a lot of work done without all the distractions of home. Now that I’m back my motivation has dropped considerably though 
*sigh*. I’ve reached a bit of a brick wall in my analysis and I’m likening it to when you make a cake and put all the ingredients in and then cook it- you can’t then un-make it and get the ingredients back into their original form. Well…I feel as though I’m ‘making my analysis cake’ but now when I try to go back and re-evaluate it it’s a pile of mush.
Anyway…due dates don’t care for how I feel. They’re cold-hearted, nightmare dwelling creatures that kick you when you’re down!
Enough grumbles…back to work.
August 30, 2008
· Filed under I'm avoiding study...
Question. Is it too crazy to have my day-by-day itinerary of my next holiday planned out? My next holiday which I plan to go on in…er… 18 months?
I’m hoping to take my brother to New Zealand. I spent a month there earlier this year and absolutely loved it. There are places I haven’t seen and want to, and as well as that I felt like I was on such a flying visit last time that I didn’t get to fully appreciate many of the places I did get to.
I really think I should lay-off the extreme advanced planning however…as I think it’s turning my brother off the idea of traveling with me! *sigh*. I have a sneaking suspicion that my anxiousness to get the thing planned is also due to the fact that I’d rather be anywhere but chained to my desk metaphorically dry-reaching an honours thesis that just isn’t ready to come out.
